I remember many years ago when I was one of only two women leaders in a room filled with over a dozen male executives. A new male leader had just joined the company and was facilitating the meeting. As the discussion progressed, I noticed how dismissive he was of the ideas my female colleague and I contributed. Then, he made a few sexist jokes and, to my shock, asked the only female VP in the room to make him coffee.
I was appalled. But back then, I was young and the most junior-ranked person in the room—several levels below everyone else. I hesitated to speak up.
What happened next, however, left a lasting impression on me. Several of our male colleagues immediately called him out on his behavior, making it clear that it was unacceptable. Some even apologized on his behalf. It was a brief moment—one that many in the room might have forgotten over the decades—but I never did. That day, I learned an important lesson: gender doesn’t determine who stands up for equality—integrity does.
That executive didn’t last long in the company. And even back then, over more than a decade ago, I was fortunate to work in an organization that valued respect and equality. I was surrounded by “real men”—colleagues who understood that respect in the workplace isn’t about gender but about treating everyone with dignity.
But not every woman is as lucky.
I’ve heard countless horror stories from female colleagues about workplace challenges—women being labeled as “difficult” or the “B-word” simply for being assertive. I’ve seen talented women be overlooked because of biases, both conscious and unconscious. And I, too, have had my share of moments that made me question my place in the corporate world.
Told I Was a ‘Bad Mother’ for Having a Career
I still vividly remember my return from maternity leave. In the most well-meaning tone, a male colleague from another department told me I was in danger of becoming a “bad mother” for choosing to stay in the corporate world. His wife had left her career after having their child, and he truly believed that any “good mother” should do the same. He said it not with malice, but with the conviction that he was guiding me toward the “right” path.
His words shook me. I started questioning myself—was I making the wrong choice for my family? Was I being selfish? My lady boss noticed I was not myself that day and asked what was wrong. When I confided in her, she said something that I carry with me to this day (not in her exact words but this is the gist of it):
“Every woman has the right to pursue her career and improve herself—for herself and for her family. Unfortunately, the world is not fully ready to see women this way, but it’s up to us and our allies to change that.”
She didn’t just lift my spirits that day—she led by example. She introduced values into the company that fostered inclusion and was respected by both men and women. Because of her leadership, we started to see more women step into decision-making roles. Inspired by her, I made a commitment to pay it forward—to support and mentor women and men who doubted their place in the workplace because of unfair biases.
Thanks to her and the many strong female leaders and allies I’ve had the privilege of working with, I never gave up. I learned to value people for their character and contributions rather than the labels society often assigns.
To the leaders who shaped my career and values, Thank you for being an inspiration!
Aakanksha Chaturvedi, Shikha Murali Guia P Bengzon Career Strategist, Bambi Machon-Quemado, Christine Donovan, Larry Tsao, Jaspreet Oberoi, Rajiv Bose, Ritessh Bhattia, Moi Lee-Rodriguez, Tanya Famador, Timothy Miller
As we celebrate International Women’s Day, I hope more organizations take real, meaningful steps toward gender equality—not just in words, but in action. Because when we uplift women, we uplift everyone.
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